shyammonk

Let us get right into the matter. The following four are the main parts of the process that helped me understand, get to terms with and thereby subside a combination of not very optimal mental attitudes / core behaviours.

Crippling anxiety was the most disturbing which i got at peace with and continues to. But the practice has changed the way i understand myself and my mind.

Peace talks

Each time a sadness or anxiety starts, it starts with a related talk. Substitute the anxiety and depression talks with peace talks.

Peace talks start with recognizing Cognitive Distortion

1. magnification of situations, others,
2. disqualifying the positives, my abilities, my history of getting things done
3. filtering to see only the criticising difficult to please and face world, completely neglecting all the good kind people who have helped me and made my life beautiful
4. all or nothing about the world, about results of actions
5. black and white thinking about the world, about satisfaction from actions, about people
6. over generalization about the world
7. fortune teller error – about the outcomes, about life awaiting
8. labeling oneself and situations as abnormal, anxious, enemy situation etc
9. emotional reasoning – if i am anxious there is reason for that. if i am feeling sad, there is valid reason for that.

etc… our cute little Cognitive Distortions … Welcome them in, thank you. "i put you there knowingly or unconsciously or because i did not understand well the situations and how to respond. thank you, now you can rest."

Now we can find the reality – just enough reality to know that none of them are completely correct

Appointment with anxiety

"Worry, we will do it at 4pm"

I would not have believed the effect of acknowledging worry and giving a time (which you may keep or not) if I did not try it

Decision to not worry – for a (very) short time span

"Just don't worry or complain or wish for changes – for one day." this was the advice from a good anxiety book.

I had to shorten the time span to : "Don't complain or worry for 20 minutes."

Worry is what we have had for a long time – the constant clutter we want to get away from. We worry about worrying, solving the worry. Reasoning that worry means we need to worry about it …

Decide not to complain and worry for just a short time – whatever time span you feel comfortable.

Body – Back to life size, Reference

Mapping the fears as tensions on the body immediately makes overwhelming anxieties life size.

One comes back to the reality that it is just in my body, here now. Changes need not be made anywhere else. Changes don't need anything outside of me. They are just tensions in our body.

Once upon a time, they were left there because of real or interpreted threats. Defences to shame, embarrassment, punishments, unpleasant results. Shame and embarrassment are told to be the master male emotions – it could be there in varying degrees in most men, it is said.

Here now, are they valid. They are felt because they remain as tension habits of muscles in our body. So direct your focus to the direct reason – our body, the tense muscles.

In the beginning we may give ourselves all sort of reasons why not to come back to the body, especially if the tensions are really unpleasant when acknowledged.

Soon though you will start realizing that you have reopened the path to here now reality.

No related posts.