shyammonk

The assurance that I will protect myself appropriately with all my strength helped me to be good, to decide to do only good. Acting weakness, being the nice boy all just led to more frustration and breaking of vengence and defence and offense from fear.

The place from where mind sprung doesn't seem to know the 'negatives' from the 'positives'. It just sent the mind wherever it was asked to. And behind my back, old patterns were asking them to be driven to the most unpleasant mental terrains, as if that made me feel me, the burning and tension filling my body, as if something bad will happen if i did not go there.

When this is seen and intention is to go to somewhere good – Murugan Idli for example – it just did that too without any resistance.

"I was depressed before enlightenment and i am depressed after enlightenment" said a zen master. what is the advantage then? To see where the mind is going, is easier when you have been keen about your innards for some time.

Sometimes it looks like our state can be seen similar to when one is ltrying to stand on roller skates. Look for support and I may not be able to stand. But when i remember this is ok, i just have to keep my balance, me as a unit and nothing else for support is just fine, then one is inside, the line is inside, and one just stands.

It is all fine and there seems to be truth in the situation. Supports are a delusion and well i may not need them anyway. No shit happens!

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